Friday, October 19, 2012

Nine Reasons Cab Drivers Think You are Nuts!

We all have our gripes with the taxi system in Boston. It’s over-regulated, there aren’t enough cars and the customer service can be just plain awful.
But that doesn't mean you’re an angel when you hop into the backseat of a taxi. In fact, you probably act like a fool most of the time, especially after a night at the bar. Here are nine things we've all done at one point or another that make our taxi drivers shake their heads at our stupidity.
You have no idea where you’re going. You get in the cab and then Google the address of the bar you’re headed to. It’s 2012, people, you could have probably gotten that information before you hailed the taxi.
You swipe your credit card the wrong way – six times in a row. I swear, every time I get into a taxi, the the credit card machine was different than the last time. Strip to the left? Press a button? Add tip first? You could be stone cold sober and still look like a fool when it comes to paying.
You believe him when he says he’s Mitt Romney’s driver. OK, so maybe this isn’t really a universal thing… But it did happen to me a few weeks ago. My roommate and I hopped into the backseat of a taxi and in an animated discussion about the upcoming election (because what else is there to discuss when you’re tipsy on a Thursday night?!). “Do you know Romney?” the driver asked. “Because when he’s in town I’m his personal driver.” Impressed, we began asking questions about what the Governor is like. It was only after we paid and got out of the taxi that we realized he tricking us. Well played, sir.
You ask your driver where he’s from. And when he says Mali, you reply, “Oh, my best friend studied abroad in South Africa! I’ve heard it’s a beautiful place.” *Face palm* That’s the equivalent of telling someone you’re from Toronto, and having her reply, “Oh I’ve been to South Carolina, it’s lovely there.”
You ask him to change the radio station. You’re in a taxi for 10 minutes, max. Is it really necessary to have the driver flip through channels until you find one that’s playing “Call Me Maybe?” Not only will you hear it at the bar in a few moments anyways, you now just gave your driver the worst headache imaginable. Way to go, Carly Rae.
You’re making out in the back seat. You hop into the car with the dude you just met at the bar and start ferociously sucking face, as the cab driver clears his throat and asks you for the umpteenth time where you’re headed.
You’re crying in the back seat. Ditto. Minus the dude.
You complain about the temperature. First, you’re too hot and ask him to turn on the AC. Five minutes later, you’re freezing, and ask him to turn it down. Then you open and close the windows three times. Just take off you’re jacket bro, and you wouldn’t have these issues.
You swear you dropped your phone on the floor of the cab. Then you insist the driver pull over, turn on every light in the car and help you search for it, backing up his entire schedule. You work yourself into a tizzy thinking about how much a new iPhone 5 is going to cost…only to hear your phone ring from the bottom of your massive purse. Sorry, cabbie!
See? You’re not perfect either. That being said, I’d like to offer an apology to Boston taxi drivers on the behalf of your customers. We’ll be sure to tip well this weekend.

No comments:

Post a Comment